"Even the most productive writers are expert dawdlers…"

John and I had read that a good way to make progress on our research was to have a writing group. Basically, meet with other PhD students at a designated time and place to work on your dissertation/ research/ latest paper/ advisor's pet project. A writing group helps because you have a scheduled meeting time and you can all help to keep each other accountable. There will be no wasting time on facebook playing a game or getting distracted by your cat attacking her hind end, yet again.

Jeff already has a good version of his dissertation in hand, so John, Mark, and I have to catch up. I keep telling Mark that we are going to drag him with us to graduation in May. So, today we had our first writing group. John, Mark, and I met at Saxby's Coffee to get some good writing done. Since we could each see what the other was doing, it really helped to cut down on our procrastinating and, being away from home and the tv helped cut down on the distractions.

I think I got a lot accomplished, even without Trixie's help. I just won't tell her that. We have already scheduled our next writing group. We are in the home stretch and can't get distracted now.

Everything, everywhere, someway, somehow is Math. You just never know when you're the quotient and when you're the remainder. (Hurdle 2: Comprehensive Exam and Proposal)

It was horrible... extremely horrible... but I am done and that is the important part. After three hours, I am now a PhD Candidate. I met a woman who was outside of the room who was a recent PhD graduate. She said comps and proposal was the worst day of her life. I have to say that it is in the top 5 of my worst experiences... For those who have not yet conquered this hurdle, it is the lowest and hardest part of the dissertation process. When I did mine, I was able to do my Comprehensive and Proposal at the same time. The rules have now changed so you have to do the Comprehensive exam at least a day before your Proposal presentation. Good luck wrangling your committee members twice in such a short time. Wrangling cats would probably be easier.

Of course, one of my committee members was late to the event. I actually had to track him down and did have a moment (or 5) where I contemplated making a run for it. Unfortunately, I had left my keys in the room. Won't make that mistake again!

The first thing they did was kick me out of the room so that they could decide on the rules for my torture. The presentation of my proposal was easy since I was very familiar with it. Then the comprehensive exam began. I had the false impression that I just had to last 2 hours. That hope was dashed when one of my committee members said that he had all day. I contemplated running again. after 3 hours, I was asked to leave the room while the remaining members (one had left) decided my fate.

After what seemed like forever, I was called back in to discover my fate. I had passed, but with provisions. I just cared about the fact that I had passed.

 

So, if you haven't gotten to this point, know that this will be the worst part of the whole process. Though your advisor shouldn't let you do this hurdle without being ready, I did have a friend who failed it his first time, but did pass it his second time. Most people do pass with provisions which could range from a answering a written set of questions to adding a chapter to your proposal to washing their cars (jk, it's never as easy as just washing their cars). Once you are through this hurdle, it's smooth sailing.

 

At least it is over and I just have to do this one more time.
Some helpful information I got from Jeff for writing a proposal presentation:

Introduction

1. What problem are you trying to solve, and why is it important?
2. Does anyone actually care if you solve it, and if so, why?

Background

1. Who else has tried to solve this problem (or similar ones), and
   what did they do?
2. What aspect of the problem didn't they solve that you plan to address?
3. It's easy to spend too much time on this part.  Be very brief.  A
   few slides at most.

Proposed Solution
What is your proposed solution?

Methodology

1. How will you test to see if you succeeded?
2. Are you comparing it to other state-of-the-art approaches?
3. Are you using any standard test problems?
4. What statistical measures will you use in your comparison?
5. Do you have any preliminary results?

Conclusion
If you succeed, what contributions will you make to the field?

Seattle 2012

Destiny is something we've invented because we can't stand the fact that everything that happens is accidental. August 2, 2012

Today we head to Seattle by way of Detroit. I can't recommend Detroit. I have to say that, for a city that has the highest murder rate, the airport is quite nice. We did have some entertainment with a flight (not ours) being cancelled because the captain was missing (passengers weren't happy).

Dave's airplane karma held so we were seated in front of the bathroom and surrounded by boisterous kids. I brought a bottle of Benadryl, but Dave said I wasn't allowed to spike their Pepsi.
Once we made it to Seattle, Uncle Dad and Aunt Corinne picked us up. They were held up a bit by a drug bust in the cell phone lot.

We are now safe and sound in the B&B. We were greeted by one of the resident cats and dog and are now going to collapse for the night.
Susan

Marriage is hard enough without bringing such low expectations into it.
August 3, 2012

After a great breakfast at the B&B, we headed to Matthew's to work in his deck. When Matthew ripped the crotch out of his pants, Dave tried to convince him to use the tool belt as a loin cloth, but Matt wasn't brave enough for that kind of fashion statement. I personally thought he could have fixed it with duct tape. The government uses it all the time so it has to be good.

While everyone else worked hard, Aunt Corinne and I supervised, made sure everyone stayed fed and hydrated, and even fixed some boo boos. All of the batteries in the power tools finally died and refused to recharge (claimed they were too hot), so we called it day.

After quick showers, we all headed to the Crab Pot for a big family dinner. Both clans came for an old fashioned crab boil. Though dinner was uneventful, there was some excitement in the parking lot when we left. Everyone in our party was spared,someone gang of kids broke the windows of 13 cars to steal stuff lying around.

Then it was time to head back to the B&B. We grabbed some chocolate on the way as a snack. Since we have to get up early tomorrow to continue working on the house, it is definitely time for bed.

Susan
P.S. The subject lines are quotes from Sleepless in Seattle.

"Well, this is fate! She's divorced, we don't want to redo the cabinets, and you need a wife. What do they call it when everything intersects?" "The Bermuda Triangle."
August 4, 2012

Today Aunt Corinne and I were road warriors while the men worked on the deck. We fetched coffee, lunch, replacement bits and tape measures, friends from the airport, and later dinner. It's a tough job, but someone has to do it.

The men made great progress and will hopefully finish it up tomorrow. Of course they won't be able to work as late since we have the wedding reception at 5. There was some confusion regarding the dress code. Some people brought jeans while others have brought suits and little black dresses so the dancing and bonfires should be interesting.

Everyone is worn out now so I see an early bedtime tonight.

Susan

Verbal ability is a highly overrated thing in a guy, and it's our pathetic need for it that gets us into so much trouble.
August 5, 2012

Our B&B is very nice, but is in the middle of nowhere. Garmin actually says we're floating in a forest. It is nice and quiet at least.

  

Today we're working on the deck again. We're down to just Matthew, Uncle Dad, and Dave, but they have a good system going. Aunt Corinne and I carried boards and fetched refreshments.

Matthew was complaining that Dave and I brought the heat with us. It was up to 90. Matt couldn't understand how Dave was comfortable in pants while he was sweating like Cybaca. The poor dog was trying to stay cool in the shade and her ball so I couldn't throw it anymore. There was actually a heat advisory for the temperature! Northerners....

   

King County gives Big Brother a run for its money. They take satellite pictures every two years to track what people have done on their land and ensure they had the proper permits. Apparently that's how Matthew got into trouble for his garage.

 Then it was time to head back to get ready for the party. We stopped by Safeway to get some Aloe and I managed to offend a man in food stamps. He couldn't remember the pin so I, trying to be helpful and not realizing it was not a check card, told him to use it as credit card. He didn't appreciate it. Though Matthew said we could show up naked, we decided to go for jeans. The party was held at John's Place. The owner named it after his friend who died. On the way there, we passed a student driver who managed to total a Cadillac (what moron teaches students to drive in a Cadillac) and a man who got his water out of a fire hydrant.

The party was quite nice. People were allowed to bring their dogs and they kept an eye on the kitchen to make sure no shenanigans occurred. Uncle Dad and Madison both gave wonderful toasts and then it was time for the dancing and hay rides. Since we are heading back to work on the porch tomorrow, we left when the party started to really get going. We headed back to the B&B to get some sleep. We stopped to grab some ice cream on the way to finish a great night.

Morning will be here soon so better head to bed.
Susan

Your destiny can be your doom.
August 6, 2012

 Today Aunt Corinne and I played road warriors again. Dave, Matthew, and Uncle Dad almost finished the deck, but ram out of screws. Matthew offered to fly us back to help him finish it and other pieces of the house. He also said Dave was quite durable.

While the Northerners sat in the sun complaining about the heat (low 90's), Dave and I sat in the shade with the fan. Silly Yankees. :)

Before we knew it, it was time to head back to the airport. Dave and Uncle Dad took showers at Matt and Robin's house to spare the passengers. Since they had worn the same work clothes the entire time we were there, the hammers came in handy to prevent the clothes from walking away and get them into the luggage. We got to eat dinner with Aunt Corinne and Uncle Dad before their plane took off to Alaska. Dave and I are now awaiting our flight to head back home. We seem to be in the hinter boonies called the S gates. It seems to be the area that time and personnel forgot with the bathrooms still having ash trays in them. It does look like they are trying to update the place, but it mostly looks like a big mess. We made it to Detroit and it appears some people have a rough night. That or the police are using Delta blankets to cover dead bodies. Some actually have little tents set up.

It was a long trip, but we have now made it home. Dave and Trixie are now doing laundry (his deck building clothes will need an extra wash) and I'm on the way to work. Yes, I did shower first.

Countdown: Comprehensive Exam and Proposal Presentation

Well, I am finally ready (maybe) for my Comprehensive Exam and Proposal Presentation. Luckily, I can do both at the same time so that I do not have to herd cats, I mean my dissertation committee, twice for this hurdle. Qualifiers actually seem like a fond memory at this point.

21 days to go: The countdown has begun! Proposal presentation and comprehensive exams are scheduled for August 21st at 10 AM. The stress starts.

8 days to go: Just got word that Dr. Nash has approved my reading list and proposal so I guess I just need to study my butt off now.

6 days to go: My dissertation support group just gave me some awesome feedback, but now I have a lot more work to do.  I also went to the library to get an uncorrupted version of one of my comps articles. Unfortunately, it's stored in the section of the library that is closed because of asbestos and my asbestos proof invisibility cloak is at the cleaners.

5 days to go: The holy grail has been found. I don't think anyone has been here in YEARS!!!! Brodsky is now missing. Is it too late to run?

4 days to go: I have marked my territory in the lab. It's easy to spot since it is the only clean spot in there. I managed to get a new student ID since my old one expires on Monday. The girl who made it claimed that my lab access should transfer to the new card. She was wrong. Good thing I kept my old card since the lady in charge of the access was out today. I finally found Brodsky and am redoing my proposal slides... again. I can at least say I haven't cried yet.

3 days to go: I'm so sick of reading. Dave and Trixie have started avoiding me. Something about growling. I wonder when I should tell them they get to listen to me practice later. Currently Trixie is trying to help by reading a paper on Statistical Databases. I asked Brodsky if I could bring beer for the committee members for my presentation like I did when I presented to my support group. He said hard liquor would be better.

2
 days to go:  Earlier, I couldn't remember what the month was. For some reason, I thought my birthday (in June) was coming soon. I think I need sleep. I have run out of peanut M&M's so I've delved into my stash of Girl Scout cookies that I hid for a rainy day. As fate would have it, it is actually raining today. I managed to read and take notes on my reading list and am now practicing my proposal presentation on Pickles. Trixie wouldn't kept falling asleep so I gave up on that half. Of course, my OCD has reared its ugly head so I am using several different colored highlighters and tabs to mark things. I think Dave may condemn the dining room by the time this is done.

Countdown: tomorrow at 10 am is the day. No, I do not feel ready. No, I do not think I will get a good night's sleep. No, my new student ID still won't work for the lab, but my old one still does. No, I'm not certain that the cat isn't hiding in the basement till I'm done. Yes, Brodsky changed my slides again. But I did find a pretty flower in the parking garage on campus so I know someone loves me. :)

Honor Flight Chicago: July 2012

 

Today I'm heading to DC with Steve's intern Justin. I know, I do that every day for work, but this time it's for something fun! I ,along with many other guardians, nurses, greeters, and even paramedics, are taking 89 WW II veterans around to see the memorials dedicated to them. Since we are loosing an average of 1000 WW II veterans a day, this is an important service.

So, into the Jeep I went at the unholy hour of 0500 and, after a few wrong turns (no surprise), Justin and I made it to Dulles to start the day. As I never served in the military, I don't have a uniform to wear so I got an avocado green shirt to put on identifying me as a guardian. Nurses wear red ones so we can easily find them. Very helpful.

After a brief orientation, it was time to meet our veterans! When their plane arrived, two firetrucks gave them a salute usually reserved for retiring pilots: the created an arch of water over the plane as it taxied to the gate. We had some Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts along with many other, some bearing signs, here to help us welcome them. They were all surprised to receive such a warm welcome.
Once I met Bill Barnard, the veteran I got to spend my day with, we headed to our bus. Once there, I handed him the challenge coins I had gotten from friends and coworkers: Army Veteran (he served in the Army), WW II Veteran, FBI, and US Marshals. He was very excited and said he would build a display case for them.
 

Once everyone was loaded, we were off! With DC traffic, we had some time to talk before our first talk. Bill, now 91, was in college studying economics in 1943 when he was called to serve in the Army. He was part of the 71st Infantry Division and travelled through France, Germany, and Austria. When he completed his service in 1946, he went back to school to complete his BA in economics and then went on to law school under the GI Bill. Though he passed the bar, he never practiced law. Instead, he took over the family construction business upon his father's death.

As it took so long to load everyone into the bus, we had to content ourselves with driving around the Iwo Jima monument and not stopping by it. Bill told me the story that there were 13 hands raising the American flag with the 13th hand being the hand of God. Though this appears to be an urban legend, I like Bill's version better.

Our first stop was the WW II memorial. A congressman from Illinois was there to welcome our veterans. We had some time before the ceremony to honor them started so Bill and I walked around to find the column with his state displayed on it. We also went to the wall of stars where each star represents 100 lives lost during the war. Bill paraphrased one author saying that we all wrote a blank check to the government, and some of us paid a greater price than others.

Then it was time for the ceremony. All of our veterans were gathered for the ceremony. The color guard was there and a Marine came to play taps. When it was over, we had a little more time before we had to head back to the buses.

Our next stop was the Korean War memorial. Some of the veterans did not take well to the heat here so they stayed in the air conditioned buses while the rest of us went to see the Korean War memorial, the Lincoln memorial, and, if adventurous, the Vietnam memorial. Bill didn't even think twice before we headed to the Vietnam memorial so that we could find the name of his old friend's son who died while there. We did get a little turned around (I should have brought my Garmin), but we did make it. We stopped on the way at the Lincoln memorial where he showed me some architectural tricks he had learned. I'm sure everyone was staring at us while we went to our knees to get eye level with the steps to observe that the middle of the step was higher than the rest. With the help of volunteers at the Vietnam memorial, we were able to find the name of his old friend's son. After a quick stop to get a Dove ice cream bar, we headed back to the bus.

Along the way, he told me more about his time in the war. He told me the story of his friend Marty Miller. While in Austria, they helped the Jews at one of the liberated concentration camps. The Austrians did not want the "walking skeletons" out in the open where they would be forced to see them, so the Army had to help keep them contained in the camps. There was a supply train that went by that carried food. Marty took his tank and parked it on the train tracks, forcing the train to stop so that they could get the food that was desperately needed for the Jews. Unfortunately, they still lost many of them and would stack the dead by the gates every morning for burial.

Bill also talked about how they would only march at night to avoid German soldiers and would have to have their camp up by dawn.

Then it was time to head to the Air and Space Museum at Dulles. These veterans may be older than us, but they have a lot of energy. One of the soldiers who came to be a guardian was worn out and fell asleep on the bus ride. His veteran made sure none of us woke him till we arrived at Dulles.
Once there, the Smithsonian guides took us around a great tour. We saw the Enola Gay and even the last Sikorsky JRS-1, the only US plane that survived Pearl Harbor. After viewing other highlites in the museum, it was time to head back to the airport.

After dinner, our veterans still had energy. We had some swing dancers come perform for us while we ate dinner. Afterwards, some of our veterans and guardians got up to dance as well. Then it was time to take our last pictures and send them back home.

It was heartwarming that so many strangers came up to the veterans at the various sites and thanked them for their service. Bill later told me that it was the first time anyone has ever thanked him for his service. I look forward to doing this again in October.

Avoiding the Honor Committee

I admit it: I'm a member of the Honor Committee. Every school seems to have an Honor Code and a committee that hears violations of it. Though this is college, I am amazed with how many cases we hear every semester. Though I can't talk about the actual cases, I thought that I would at least summarize some information that students might find useful.

1. Don't cheat or plagiarize. Believe it or not, professors are smart. They probably even know more tricks that you do.
2. Read the syllabus. Not knowing that you couldn't do x because you hadn't bothered to read it is not a defense.
3. If you miss a class, find out what you missed from the professor since a student may have attended class, but may not have paid attention. Again, not knowing you couldn't do x because you weren't at class that day is not a defense.
4. Learn when and how to cite references. This is apparently not taught in high school any more so it is generally covered in freshman English. If not, most schools have writing centers that are free so go visit if you are having trouble.
5. If you get caught, just fess up. There is nothing more annoying that a student who is caught and tries to say that they didn't do it. When it is obvious (i.e., we have video of it), it aggrivates your case and can lead to a harsher sentence.
6. At least at GMU, we can't force a professor to do something. We can make suggestions, but we can't (and usually don't want to) force the professor to allow you to redo a lab, paper, test on which you cheated or plagiarized.
7. Before you submit something, make sure it is the correct version as you are responsible for what you submit. I really hate having to hear a case where a student obviously sent in a rough draft of a paper where information wasn't properly cited. Just in case, this will not work as a defense.

The First Hurdle: Qualifiers

Though they differ from school to school, qualifiers seem to strike fear and panic in most PhD students. For most schools, quals are a tool to weed out students who may not be ready for the rigors of the PhD process. The process is different between schools and even between programs with some schools having classes that must be passed while others have one or more written exams that must be passed. For me, it was four 2 hour exams in 4 different subject areas of computer science. I was lucky and had some choice in what exams I had to take.

While I am through that hurdle, I still remember living on Peanut M&Ms and Cherry Coke during that week and wearing sweat pants ever day. I promise that I did shower, unlike some people. I also remember people getting an exam, looking at it, and then just leaving the room. Others left in tears after the two hours were up. I did hear some people say that they just came to the exams cold to just see what they could pass. With only two chances to take the exams, that method seemed rather risky. Not surprisingly, the student I met who chose this approach had to retake all four quals.

Everyone has a different way of preparing for qualifiers. I have CDO (OCD with the letters in the proper order) so my notes are very thorough and well organized. I made sure to take the classes from the professors who wrote the exams and studied 2 hours a day for 4 months. I studied a different subject every week and worked through problems and read through the slides. I took the week of quals off from work and basically lived on campus.

While I and the members in my dissertation group have passed this hurdle, I still have students referred to me from the CS department (my notes are well known). Sometimes it is a student who is on her last chance (how we met Coco) and for others it is their first foray. I'm currently working with two students now for quals next month. Some tips my group and I have given:

1. TAKE THE CLASSES that the quals are based on! Preferably, take them from the professor who writes the qual.
2. Don't wait till the last minute to start studying. A month really isn't enough time if you have a job or classes taking up part of your time.
3. If you have a choice, take them in the fall. Taking them in-between fall and spring semester is rough as you do not have time to recover from the end of fall semester before having to cram on quals. Not to mention trying to study while everyone is celebrating the holidays is depressing.
4. Take the week of quals off if possible. My coworkers were very helpful in this. Trying to concentrate on work knowing you have quals that day is difficult as is concentrating on your qual when you are still thinking about work.
5. Join or form a study group for quals.
6. When you walk out of a qual, write down the questions you remember just in case you didn't pass.
7. For PhD Students at GMU, I have notes for the following quals: Foundations of Computer Science, Programming Languages, Database Management, Software Construction, and Software Modelling. I am willing to share, but do ask that students add to them to keep them current for future students.
8. It is OK to cry. I know I broke down when I was finished. I also remember talking to friends as they were taking them and some of them did too.
9. Failing is not the end of the world. I took quals three times before I passed (I know I said you have two chances, but there are always loopholes). You just have to not give up.
10. If you did fail one or more quals, go look at them to see what you did wrong. If possible, try to challenge. It can't hurt.

"Piled Higher and Deeper" by Jorge Cham www.phdcomics.com